Anyway, as the trade show guru, I guess I’m supposed to tell you whether or not trade show giveaway pens work. I don’t know. But I recommend using them for trade show giveaways and handouts. It should not be a trade show secret that proper trade show planning means avoiding the mistake of not have some kind of incentive for attendees to visit your trade show booth. When it comes to selecting a trade show giveaway, custom-printed pens are relatively cheap, and they’re useful and people hold on to them. I’m not sure if I’d recommend going with the more expensive fancy versions though. I think I’d stick with the basic ballpoint-style pen, with a company name, a simple line saying what one does, and a website and phone number. I know there are lots of companies that supply these custom-imprinted trade show giveaway pens, but I can’t recommend any one specific company. Just make sure that when you order your trade show giveaway pens that you order plenty, as pens tend to be popular with the trade show zombies.

But back the the question in the title of this post – do trade show giveaway pens actually work? (update – I don’t mean does the ink in them work so that you can write with them, I mean does anyone every buy anything from or do business with the company listed on the outside of the pen!) I’ve never bought anything because I saw a company name on a pen. Never. I’ve stayed at a Marriott, but not because I have their pen. We take our kids to Dr. Ruby, but again, not because we have his pen. We go there because he is an awesome, extremely competent pediatric dentist (and we pay for it). We also recommend him to all of our friends. He is a good example of a business that probably benefits from providing excellent service and having plenty of free word-of-mouth advertising.

But enough about our dentist… back to the question again. Do trade show giveaway pens work? Again, I don’t know. From my own personal experience, I don’t think so. But then again, could you land your biggest account or sale of the year because somebody saw your company name on a giveway pen that cost you fifty cents? Maybe… So I ask you, my loyal readers. Have you every bought a product or service because you saw a company name on a pen?

And if you answer this question, please also mention if you have a custom-imprinted pen handy and what company or business name is on it.

Trade show zombies are those trade show attendees who wander up and down the aisles between the trade show booths with oversize bags, grabbing any available free candy and more importantly, grabbing any and all available free loot (aka trade show giveaways and/or trade show schwag). You can spot them by their glassy-eyed stares and often, by flecks of drool running down their chins. They have one purpose – to go by each and every trade show booth at the show and get whatever free stuff they can find.

The problem is that usually trade show zombies aren’t at the trade show to do business with any of the vendors at the booths. They are there for the free stuff (apparently they don’t know that free ain’t free). A horde of trade show zombies can clean a trade show booth out of free M&Ms or post-it pads in minutes…

So how do you avoid a horde of trade show zombies descending on your booth? If you don’t have a necrosledge (to be discussed at the end of this post) ready to fight off the trade show zombies, you can fall back on the following trade show advice. One key is proper trade show planning. Focus on bringing qualified prospects to your trade show booth. Don’t focus on the general masses (which often have a high ratio of trade show zombies). If you have a contest or giveaway, make sure it is targeted. If you are giving out an iPod, have people fill out a “qualification form” and answer specific questions. Require that they then talk to a salesperson before they are entered. Make sure your contest or high-value trade show giveaways are for qualified prospects only. When people come into your trade show booth, qualify them immediately, and see if they are interested in your business. A trade show isn’t the time to shoot the bull. Don’t cater to the trade show zombies. You’re at the trade show to create and conduct business, not to feed and supply the trade show zombies. When you identify one, send him packing. And, if you can, keep a necrosledge handy for the more persistent ones.

Speaking of necrosledges, I mentioned that I’d end this post by talking about REAL zombies. Actually, I’m going to quote from the beginning of a great post about zombies that I read a few years ago. I first heard about the following post from Tim, aka the King of the Rednecks. The post is called “How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse” by Araminta Matthews, and it goes something like this…

“Now here we have a topic about which both my partner and I have thought long and hard about. When the zombie apocalypse takes place, he and I will survive and we will survive well. Let me share with you our plans so that you, too, might survive the impending doom.

First, we have NECROSLEDGE. Yes, they’re machetes painted black by my best friend and fellow zombie-anti-enthusiast, Steve [not Steve the trade show guru though], that read “Necrosledge” along the sides. These are mounted on our walls in the central room of our upstairs apartment for easy access from anywhere should zombies attack. Why machetes and not shotguns? Simple. There has been a lot of debate around the proper way to destroy a zombie beast, but all of them seem to agree that severing the brain from the spinal cord is the way to go. That somehow, without this pivotal connection, zombies are no longer reanimated dead: they’re just plain dead. So, machetes. They don’t need reloading, they don’t require precision and a good shooting eye, and they can be handled by young and old alike. Hack and slash, baby.”

To read this most excellent post “How To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse” in its entirety, go here. And remember, at your next trade show, beware the trade show zombies!

UPDATE: As I write in my newest post, this original post about trade show zombies seems to be attracting a heck of a lot of spamming zombies. I guess spammers must know who they are and what they do. In any event, I’ve been thinking more about trade show zombies. I think the term should apply to more than just trade show attendees. I think it should also apply to trade show exhibitors that just follow the crowd (zombies) and do whatever all the other trade show exhibitors are doing, and never thinking outside the box. The term should also apply to trade show products companies and trade show marketing consultants that just follow the crowd and never think outside of the box. So with that in mind, here’s some more guru wisdom.

When looking for trade show display companies, avoid the companies that act like trade show zombies and make displays just like everyone else. Fortunately, this linked company does not suffer from zombie-itis.

When creating a trade show design, don’t design like trade show zombies. Use this link and common sense, and create a zombie-free design.

And when evaluating trade show marketing consultants, avoid those that act like trade show zombies. Follow this link and you’ll again find a consultant who doesn’t suffer from zombie-itis, but rather who knows what she is doing and has the experience to back it up.

And always remember to carry a necrosledge and keep your eyes open for trade show zombies, and zombies in general. You never know where or when you might run into them!

Anyway, this past weekend we met some friends for an afternoon at the zoo. When the zoo was closing we decided we should all head over to their house for dinner. They had everything they needed to make us a tasty spaghetti dinner, except for the spaghetti pasta. I volunteered to stop at the supermarket on the way to their house to pick up some spaghetti. When we got to the supermarket, I told my wife and kids that they could wait in the car while I ran into the store. I found the spaghetti fast enough, but then picked the wrong line for checking out. I think it’s genetics… no matter what line I pick at a store, it always ends up taking the longest. I just wish there was a way to make money with this “talent” that I have. Anyway, ten minutes later I finally paid for the spaghetti and left the store. When I got back to our car, my wife and kids were screaming…

I didn’t take that long in the store, I though, but that’s not what my wife was screaming about. She had just WON! It turns out it was fortuitous that I took so long in the store because while I was in there, my wife and kids were listening to one of the bigger LA radio stations on our car radio (not everyone in this country has an iPod). During a break, the DJ announced that he had a “four pack” of tickets to Knott’s Berry Farm (an amusement park) to give away to the 30th caller. My four-year-old son heard this and said to my wife that she should call in, so on a whim, she did. The first time my wife called she got an “all circuits busy” message, but she called back and got through. The DJ told her she was the 30th caller! SCREAM! What luck, and perfect timing as well. We’ve been talking about taking my son to Knotts’ for his fifth birthday, which is why he recognized the offer and told my wife to call (I’m not a fan of over-priced, crowded amusement parks, but going to them on rare occasions is one of my fatherhood duties).

I’ve never called a radio station. My wife says she and her friends used to do it when she was a teenager, but she never has since then. Well, when she told me that she’d called in and won, we all screamed together, “We’re going to Knott’s!”  We then listened through two more songs for the next commercial break, and then had the immense pleasure of hearing the DJ come on with a recorded version of the phone call. We heard him telling my wife she was the winner (SCREAM!) and then asking her what her name was and what her favorite radio station was. All of Southern California (or at least those people listening to 104.3FM that day) got to hear my now famous wife answer those two questions.

I can’t say that I’ve ever had a similar encounter with fame. I did get to meet Bill Cosby when I was in high school, and I’ve had letters to the editor published in two different newspapers (do people still read newspapers today?), but I’ve never had my voice on the radio, much less broadcasted throughout Southern California.

So have you had a brush with fame?

UPDATE 1/22: I guess I should know better since I did write about when free aint free. At least free aint simple in this case. The radio station called to tell my wife she could come in and pick up the tickets. Since we live about 70 miles away, she asked if they could mail the tickets. No problem, they said, we just need you to fill out some paperwork and fax it back. They then faxed us a 6 page document with three pages of forms to complete and fax back, along with a copy of her drivers license and a Federal W9 with her social security number. ARGGHHHHH!

What trade show booths and duct tape have in common is that an effective trade show booth should be able to pass the duct tape test. And no, the duct tape test do NOT mean that you can fix or repair the trade show booth with duct tape. What the duct tape test means is that you need an effective trade show display design that is clear and speaks for itself. Your design needs to say who you are, what you do, and how you can help your potential prospect. In a nutshell, the trade show booth duct tape test is to image yourself at your trade show, standing in your trade show booth, with a piece of duct tape over your mouth…

Now that you’re standing there in your trade show booth with duct tape over your mouth, when people walk by (and you can’t ask them questions or invite them into your booth, or explain what your company does), will your booth design do this for you? Will your trade show display design stop people, and let them know who you are, what you do, and how you can help them? I know you’re probably thinking that people will stop to ask you why you’ve got duct tape on your mouth, but I think you get the point.

The duct tape test actually applies to a lot of marketing material in addition to trade show booths, and includes brochures, mailers, and yes, even and especially blogs. Your trade show booth design (and other marketing materials) should speak for themselves and communicate what you need them to communicate. You shouldn’t need to or rely on “explaining” what the design means. It cracks me up when somebody asks me to review a postal mailer design and then when I don’t “get it” proceeds to tell me what the design is supposed to mean. Unfortunately, they won’t be at my mailbox to “explain” the mailer when I get it. The duct tape test means plain and simple that your design needs to speak for itself, and effective trade show booths need to pass it.

So now that you know what trade show booths and duct tape have in common, and what the duct tape test is, my question to you is…

Does your blog pass the duct tape test?

The top 3 trade show display design mistakes all have to do with the overall message of the design. A good trade show display design needs to have a clear, focused message. The design needs to state in no uncertain terms who the company is, what they do, what they can do for the customer, and offer some credible proof to back up their claim.

MISTAKE NUMBER ONE ~ Being too vague.
If you look at a trade show display design and you have no idea what the company does or why you should talk to them, they have blown it. While there is nothing wrong with a big captivating picture and a clearly visible company name, it that’s all there is to the design is, it is too vague. The design needs to include the message above, and cover who, what, and why.

MISTAKE NUMBER TWO ~ Being too specific.
Nearly as common as the the mistake of a design being too vague is the mistake of a design being too specific. Some people get carried away with their message and write a novel. Every word on the display design should be read and digested in under a minute, or less. People aren’t going to stop and read 1,000 words, and if you have that many words (or more), the font size is probably going to be so small that they’ll need to get within a foot of the display, blocking it from everyone else’s view.

By the way, here’s a bonus design secret: keep most if not all of your text on a trade show booth display design on the upper third of the display. This will insure it is visible over the heads of the crowd that will be at your trade show booth… the crowd you’ll have because you know about the importance of planning for a trade show, right?

MISTAKE NUMBER THREE ~ Missing the boat.
Having a short, concise message isn’t enough if the message is focused on you and your company instead of on your prospective customer. The message needs to tell the customer what’s in it for them. You need to tell them how you’ll make their lives easier, solve their problems, or save them money. Your claims need to be believable and you should offer credible testimonials to back up the claims. Your design must have a clear message, and it must be all about the customer and their needs.

So there you have three major trade show display design mistakes (and a free bonus secret!). Feel free to leave a comment below if you have another design mistake to add to the list. Perhaps we can make this a top 10 list instead of a top 3 list!

And of course if you’re looking for a trade show display, you can’t go wrong checking out the trade show displays at the company I work for. Are you still struggling to come up with the Ultimate Christmas Gift? Maybe you should consider how a nicely wrapped trade show display with a big bow on it might look under your Christmas tree? Of course, you’ll probably need a pretty big Christmas tree to fit a trade show display under it.

Movie question follow-up:
On my last post, I asked the following question: The other night we watched a movie with a turtle guru in it who said, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. But today is a Gift, which is why it is called the Present.”
Does anyone know what movie we watched? Tim guessed “Finding Nemo” and Will guessed “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – We Wish You a Turtle Christmas”. Both good guesses, but both wrong. So the question still stands. Does anyone know what the movie was?

Apparently, trade show secrets must be a hot topic. However, the trade show guru is here to tell you that there really aren’t any “secrets” to trade show success. You can spend your time searching for those secrets, just like you can search for that tradeshow special sauce, but the key to trade show success is basic marketing and hard work.

Without further ado, here are ten absolutely free trade show ”secrets” (they’re really just common sense). Start with these top ten key secrets points and save yourself $29.95.

1. Create a budget. Figure out how much it’s going to cost to exhibit at a tradeshow and determine your roi (return on investment) and see if the numbers add up and if you’ll make money (the ultimate point of most businesses).

2. Pick the right trade show. Make sure the tradeshow you’ll be attending is a target-rich prospect-rich environment. If you’re not sure who your prospect is, or what a prospect is, read basic marketing.

3. Plan for your trade show. If you’re not sure what this means, read my post trade show planning. Those that fail to plan, plan to fail.

4. Send out pre-show mailers. You can get a list of attendees from your trade show organizer. Get the list and use it. Let your prospects know you’ll be exhibiting, and give them a reason to stop by. Don’t just send out one mailer, send multiple pre-show mailers. Repetition will get your message through.

5. Consider passing out trade show giveaways (aka trade show schwag and/or trade show freebies) at your trade show booth. Make sure the trade show giveaways have your company name and contact info on them. And make sure the trade show zombies don’t get all of your trade show giveaways. Keep some cheap giveaways on hand for the trade show zombies and keep the nice trade show giveaway stuff hidden in back for your better prospects and clients.

6. Have an awesome custom trade show display with full-size custom graphics with a clear message. Your custom trade show display should stop people in their tracks when they walk by your trade show booth.

7. Take care of yourself at the trade show. Get plenty of sleep. Remember the trade show is work, not vacation. Don’t go out drinking and dancing until 2am. Save that for when you go on a real vacation. Make sure you eat a good breakfast, drink plenty of water during the day, stretch, and wear comfortable shoes. Consider getting extra padding when you rent the carpet for your trade show booth.

8. Be personable and courteous when you talk to people, but get to the point. Qualify people immediately and determine if they are a valid prospect. Do they need and want your product, and can they afford it? If they aren’t a qualified prospect, thank them, maybe give them one of your cheaper trade show giveaway pens or other cheap give-away items (maybe they’ll need something in the future, or will talk to someone who will), and then move on. There’s no point in wasting your time or their time. You’re at the trade show for business, and hopefully they are too.

9. After the show, you must follow up. Call all the prospects that you met at the show. Thank them for stopping by. Find out how you can move your business with them forward. If you can’t reach them, call again. Keep calling until you talk to them.

10. Achieve trade show zen. If you’re not sure what trade show zen is, read my post. Think ahead, plan, study the competition, remain calm, visualize your success and achieve it.

There you have it, free of charge. Ten “trade show secrets” if you want to call them that. If you want more, just keep reading the Trade Show Guru.

BTW, I want to thank Tim, the King of the Rednecks, for his glowing review of your humble trade show guru: Steve, Guru of the Trade Show. I’m impressed he found the time to write a post about little ol’ me, what with all the beer gift baskets he’s been busy making. Good Karma to you Tim, and a round of Blue Beaver beer for everyone!

Pre-Show Planning
As I wrote in my earlier post on trade show planning, you need to properly plan for your trade show. Proper planning equals calmness which equals zen. Proper trade show planning means making sure you’ve picked the right trade show to exhibit at. It also means making sure you’ve developed a budget for all the costs associated with exhibiting at the trade show and that you’ve determined your potential and likely profit will exceed that budget (and thus your trade show exhibiting plans are a money making proposition). But most importantly, proper trade show planning means that you’ve actively and effectively promoted your trade show exhibit BEFORE the show and that you can count on qualified prospects to come and find you at the show. One of the most effective ways of doing this is by sending out a pre-show mailer to all the people that be attending the show.  I actually recommend doing a series of mailers, as repetition is often critical to getting through to people. Your mailers should of course make it clear that you’ll be exhibiting at the show (and where – i.e. your booth number and a map), and your mailers should give your prospects a good reason to stop by. You need to let them know what you’ll be showing at the show, and how it will help them. It also doesn’t hurt to offer a free trade show giveaway or prize to anyone that stops by with the mailer.

At The Show Behavior
If you let people know in advance to come by your booth (and give them good reason to), then you won’t have to worry about booth traffic. It’s much easier to greet someone that comes up to your booth and says “hi, I got your mailer and I’d like to know more about your new potato-pealing-widget“, instead of acting like the above mentioned carnival barker or used car salesman, who confronts everyone that passes by (whether they’re interested or not) and tells them they should stop and listen to a sales pitch. Carnival barkers and used car salesmen have no trade show zen. Those that plan ahead and arrange for qualified traffic in advance, those people will achieve trade show zen. And reading the trade show guru for trade show marketing enlightenment and to discover an occasional trade show secret probably doesn’t hurt either…

If you’ve got a good idea of why marketing at a trade show would work for you, you need to find a trade show that will work to market your product. There are literally thousands of trade shows a year across the United States and throughout the world. You can more than likely find one in your niche. But then it important to find out how may people will be attending that show and what percentage of the attendees are potential prospects. Let’s say that you sell handheld carving knives specifically designed for carving cedar. You find a trade show in Denver about woodworking. So far, so good. They estimate 10,000 people will attend. That sound good too. But the show is about ALL aspects of woodworking, and from the information, you estimate only 10% of the people attending will be interested in carving wood by hand, and only 20% of those people are interested in carving cedar. That means only 2% (or 200) of the attendees would be potential prospects – or put another way, for every 100 people that walk by your booth, ninety eight of people will just be getting in the way of the two people who you are looking for. You should also realize that not all 10,000 attendees will walk around all of the exhibits – more than likely only a third of them will go by your booth, meaning 66 prospects instead of 200. But don’t let these numbers get you down – it just means you shouldn’t automatically pick the trade show with the most attendees – instead you want the show with the most prospects and if possible the highest percentage of prospects to attendees so that the non-prospects aren’t getting in your way.

Unfortunately, the number crunching doesn’t stop after you’ve picked the “right” show. After you pick the show, you need to develop a budget for exhibiting at the show, and then determine if you can afford it and if it is cost effective. To budget for exhibiting at the show, you’ve got to include travel to and from, staying at a hotel, the cost of the booth space, the cost of booth accessories (carpeting, power, cleaning, etc), the cost of your trade show display and graphics, the cost of brochures and other handouts, the cost of trade show giveaways (if you want to use them), and so forth. Once you come up with a rough total, you’ve got to determine if you can afford it. If you can, then you should estimate the business and/or sales you’ll generate from the show, and determine if you will make money. If you won’t, it’s time to look for another show or start wondering if trade show exhibiting is a good idea for your business…

[boyscout image above: "On My Honor" by Norman Rockwell, from 1945 issue of Boys Life]